What an Easter! This Easter was much different than any other Easter we can remember in our 36 years of life (I turned 36 on April 1st - Melisa is actually 37 but don't tell her I shared her little secret - let's just keep that between us).
We have written in the past about God knowing exactly how we felt when Jameson passed away and this year we felt an unbelievable closeness to our Lord as a result. It's hard to put into words really...let me put it this way. We praise God for teaching us from His mountain top and not letting us walk through the valley of death! We have feared no evil because His rod and His staff have comforted us. We say it's a mountain top experience because we have been blown away by what God has taught us, revealed to us, trusted us with, how He has comforted us, and the list goes on and on. He has taught us more about Himself in the death of our son than we could have learned in our life-time. He has made it so clear that it's because He gave up His son for us that our precious baby Jameson is in heaven today sitting in Jesus' lap. What a glorious picture of our loving God.
Giving thanks in all things is not always easy, but it's a command. When we truly praise Him in all things He reveals things to us that we would never have learned otherwise. We believe that all of you that have been prayer warriors for us the past 9 months (he would have been 9 months today) have an idea of what we're trying to convey. Your pain runs deep for sure, but God's says take heart I have overcome the world. He has overcome death and we fear no more. Hallelujah! Ask God for His wisdom and He will share it with you. He will give you the peace that passes all understanding and an understanding that can't be explained by worldly wisdom. We can't praise Him on our own. Ask Him for the Spirit of praise. Let everything that has breath praise the Lord. Don't let the rocks, that don't have breath, out praise you! God is so good!!!
Shifting gears a little bit...please pray for Melisa. She's up in Wisconsin right now spending time with Paul, Jen, Lily and Layla Nick. Layla was born on Jan. 20th with Simplex Dowling Meara, the same type of EB that Jameson had. God put it on our hearts to help others and that's exactly what we intend to do. Melisa arrived this afternoon and is having the time of her life. The Nick's are precious people. Layla's Caring Bridge page is caringbridge.org/visit/layla
I know they would cherish your prayers and encouragement in this difficult time. Take a minute and write a note if you can. We will update you more as the information of the trip unfolds.
We are going to throw a party like no other sometime in early summer. My father-in-law is going to cook an entire pig and a rotisserie. Everyone is invited. We will get you more information when we have picked a date. We just want to say thank you to all of you and shake your hand and hug your neck - so you better be there. You know who you are! May 9th was going to be the day, but it's Mother's Day weekend and our feeling is that to many people would be out of town that weekend??? What do you think?
Thank you for all your love for us. We praise God for each of you.
In Christ,
Todd
Help! This dogs getting me.
Monday, April 13, 2009
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Hello
I have to say... this is my first time writing on the blog since baby Jameson went to be with Jesus. I said that I was not going to write again but the Lord pressed upon my heart to share more of our lives with you. I am not sure how we are doing. People ask all of the time, how are you and I say "Just fine". What those words mean are....I am not sure how I am. The emotions are different each day. And sometimes I have NO emotions at all. The roller coaster of peace and pain comes often. I have NEVER experienced so much peace from Jesus. And on the other hand, the pain is so overwhelming at times. The great sense of loss is tremendous!!! Jesus gained an amazing baby in heaven and I lost that same baby. I miss Jameson very much. I know that God understands my pain. He lost a Son too.... and for His loss... my son now is with His Son. That is what gets me through the pains and when I remember that... the peace comes. Thank you Jesus for knowing my every emotion and YOU are GOOD all of the time.
Our family just went on a vacation. It was the boys spring break and we went to the mountains of North Carolina. We had a great time together. We fished, hiked and canoed. It was soooo cold and the boys did not want to wear jackets. They are such Florida boys....shorts and flip flops are all they know. The time together was good and Todd and I were able to look into the boys eyes and see how they were really doing. The boys seem to be handling all this really good. Zachary wants to talk about everything. He wants to listen to the music that was played at the memorial service all of the time. And he wants to tell us what he remembers about Jameson at the hospital. Zacahry is very open and really does not want to forget his baby brother. I overheard a conversation the boys were having and Zachary said to Nicholas, "Jameson will always be our brother". Nicholas just said "I know". Nicholas is the quiet one....he doesn't really talk that much about Jameson. He will listen and say a little but not very much. His personality is to think and process his emotions internally. I sometimes get a little nervous about that but....I cannot change who he is. It is a really good thing that Nicholas and Zachary are different. Zacahary's strengths are coming out (very talkative and expressive) and I believe that this is helping Nicholas process his thoughts. Just as long as their brother is being talked about...there is comfort for all of us. I have such a fear that we will forget about Jameson and that we will stop talking about him. Zachary is the one who will NOT let us stop talking about Jameson....and that makes me happy. Nicholas and his quiet strength seems to be leading him to an amazing place....he prays differently because of our loss. Nicholas's prayers are more for others and less for self. He is growing up and maturing right infront of our eyes. The boys are becoming little men who know what it is like to suffer the loss of a baby brother and see how God can use both of their strengths to help heal our family.
I will never look at life the same. When I really think about the verse that says "ALL things work together for GOOD"....something, I veiw as painful...God turns around for GOOD. We will NEVER know on this side of heaven all of the GOOD that has been brought about by a little boy with a very bad skin disease. But I stand on the truth that ALL THINGS WORK TOGETHER FOR GOOD to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.
I am not sure what to do about the blog...do I keep writing and keeping you guys up to date on us or what? I guess we will just know. I cannot tell you how much all of you guys have meant to us and how often God used you through this blog to encourage us. There were days when God spoke to us through your words. You guys are so loved by us and the prayers you prayed for us were ALL answered.
Love,
Melisa
Our family just went on a vacation. It was the boys spring break and we went to the mountains of North Carolina. We had a great time together. We fished, hiked and canoed. It was soooo cold and the boys did not want to wear jackets. They are such Florida boys....shorts and flip flops are all they know. The time together was good and Todd and I were able to look into the boys eyes and see how they were really doing. The boys seem to be handling all this really good. Zachary wants to talk about everything. He wants to listen to the music that was played at the memorial service all of the time. And he wants to tell us what he remembers about Jameson at the hospital. Zacahry is very open and really does not want to forget his baby brother. I overheard a conversation the boys were having and Zachary said to Nicholas, "Jameson will always be our brother". Nicholas just said "I know". Nicholas is the quiet one....he doesn't really talk that much about Jameson. He will listen and say a little but not very much. His personality is to think and process his emotions internally. I sometimes get a little nervous about that but....I cannot change who he is. It is a really good thing that Nicholas and Zachary are different. Zacahary's strengths are coming out (very talkative and expressive) and I believe that this is helping Nicholas process his thoughts. Just as long as their brother is being talked about...there is comfort for all of us. I have such a fear that we will forget about Jameson and that we will stop talking about him. Zachary is the one who will NOT let us stop talking about Jameson....and that makes me happy. Nicholas and his quiet strength seems to be leading him to an amazing place....he prays differently because of our loss. Nicholas's prayers are more for others and less for self. He is growing up and maturing right infront of our eyes. The boys are becoming little men who know what it is like to suffer the loss of a baby brother and see how God can use both of their strengths to help heal our family.
I will never look at life the same. When I really think about the verse that says "ALL things work together for GOOD"....something, I veiw as painful...God turns around for GOOD. We will NEVER know on this side of heaven all of the GOOD that has been brought about by a little boy with a very bad skin disease. But I stand on the truth that ALL THINGS WORK TOGETHER FOR GOOD to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.
I am not sure what to do about the blog...do I keep writing and keeping you guys up to date on us or what? I guess we will just know. I cannot tell you how much all of you guys have meant to us and how often God used you through this blog to encourage us. There were days when God spoke to us through your words. You guys are so loved by us and the prayers you prayed for us were ALL answered.
Love,
Melisa
Friday, March 13, 2009
March 13, 2009
What a week Melisa and I have had together. Time to cry, laugh, question, rest, and time to spend quality time together. One of our friends that we know through the kids baseball said the other day that they had never seen us together. Since Jameson couldn't leave the house only one of would be at Nicholas' game at a time. Well, this week we weren't apart and we loved and cherished every minute of it.
This week we found a wonderful plot under some big pine trees at the Winter Garden Cemetery. Melisa and I buried Jameson's earthly body this morning. We didn't think it would be so hard, but we had a good cry.
We want each of you to know that all your prayers for our family are being answered. God has given us amazing peace and understanding this week. We spoke to a wonderful psychologist named David Thomas and he was so encouraging. He really likes how we have handled this journey with Nicholas and Zachary. We have been so concerned for the boys, not wanting them to struggle now or years from now with underlying anger, pain, doubt, etc... David gave us some great exercises for the boys and we are pleased to announce they are handling the death of their brother better than we could of ever imagined. Again, God is answering your prayers for Nicholas and Zachary.
Please continue to pray for us. We have not done anything in the house with Jameson's bandages, crib, room or toys. We just want to take our time and ease into it as we are lead too. I will be heading back to work next week and I'm sure Melisa will have some harder days all alone in the house. Even now we don't like going in certain rooms and we have been avoiding those areas (bandage room!).
We told you we would get you the address for donations. It is:
Arnold Palmer Medical Center Foundation
3160 Southgate Commerce Blvd Suite 50
Orlando, FL. 32806
Please note that it's in Jameson's name so they will direct it accordingly. Their is one little RDEB boy that we would love to help.
If you feel comfortable you can make the check's out to us and will direct them to the EB families around the country that really need financial help. We know of many families that have an EB child and they either can't afford bandages at all or have such a limited supply that they have to wash them out and attempt to re-use them. We can't image!!! Please know that our hearts desire is to help as many families as we can.
We will continue to update the blog and share of the God's mercies that are new everyday.
Love,
Todd
This week we found a wonderful plot under some big pine trees at the Winter Garden Cemetery. Melisa and I buried Jameson's earthly body this morning. We didn't think it would be so hard, but we had a good cry.
We want each of you to know that all your prayers for our family are being answered. God has given us amazing peace and understanding this week. We spoke to a wonderful psychologist named David Thomas and he was so encouraging. He really likes how we have handled this journey with Nicholas and Zachary. We have been so concerned for the boys, not wanting them to struggle now or years from now with underlying anger, pain, doubt, etc... David gave us some great exercises for the boys and we are pleased to announce they are handling the death of their brother better than we could of ever imagined. Again, God is answering your prayers for Nicholas and Zachary.
Please continue to pray for us. We have not done anything in the house with Jameson's bandages, crib, room or toys. We just want to take our time and ease into it as we are lead too. I will be heading back to work next week and I'm sure Melisa will have some harder days all alone in the house. Even now we don't like going in certain rooms and we have been avoiding those areas (bandage room!).
We told you we would get you the address for donations. It is:
Arnold Palmer Medical Center Foundation
3160 Southgate Commerce Blvd Suite 50
Orlando, FL. 32806
Please note that it's in Jameson's name so they will direct it accordingly. Their is one little RDEB boy that we would love to help.
If you feel comfortable you can make the check's out to us and will direct them to the EB families around the country that really need financial help. We know of many families that have an EB child and they either can't afford bandages at all or have such a limited supply that they have to wash them out and attempt to re-use them. We can't image!!! Please know that our hearts desire is to help as many families as we can.
We will continue to update the blog and share of the God's mercies that are new everyday.
Love,
Todd
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
March 4, 2009
Just wanted to give a quick update. Melisa and I are doing well. We can't wait to see you all on Friday.
A lot of people have been asking us what they can do. Melisa and I have a heart to help other babies that have the same condition that Jameson had -epidermilysis bullosa, EB . We ask that in lieu of flowers that donations be made. We don't have all the information from Winnie and Arnold Palmer Hospitals yet but I will get it up on the blog as soon as possible.
Please pray for our family specifically during the night and morning. It's so hard at bedtime and when we wake up in the morning.
Thank you all for your support.
Todd
A lot of people have been asking us what they can do. Melisa and I have a heart to help other babies that have the same condition that Jameson had -epidermilysis bullosa, EB . We ask that in lieu of flowers that donations be made. We don't have all the information from Winnie and Arnold Palmer Hospitals yet but I will get it up on the blog as soon as possible.
Please pray for our family specifically during the night and morning. It's so hard at bedtime and when we wake up in the morning.
Thank you all for your support.
Todd
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
March 3rd, 2009. Celebration Day
This morning at 6:08 Jameson went home to be with Jesus. He's now got a perfect body without EB and without breathing problems. He's running around playing with Jesus. I told Melisa that Jesus is probably rubbing his skin all over the place and no blisters!!!
The past 24 hours have been really hard, as you can imagine. At noon yesterday a MRI was done on Jameson's brain. It came back showing that severe damage had been done to all parts of his brain as a result of him coding for 17 minutes. The ER doctors kept him alive through chest compressions. I'm not a fan of CPR anymore...just kidding of course (the good of CPR far outweighs the bad). At 7:30 last night Jameson's breathing tube was taken out and the strong little guy comfortably breathed on his own for about 10 hours before he went home to receive his new, perfect body.
We thank each and everyone of you for your unfailing love and prayers for us. We know that God has answered all your prayers for Jameson. We feel a peace that passes all understanding.
Our memorial service is set for this Friday at First Baptist of Orlando's Henry Chapel at 11 a.m.
Thank you.
Todd and Melisa
The past 24 hours have been really hard, as you can imagine. At noon yesterday a MRI was done on Jameson's brain. It came back showing that severe damage had been done to all parts of his brain as a result of him coding for 17 minutes. The ER doctors kept him alive through chest compressions. I'm not a fan of CPR anymore...just kidding of course (the good of CPR far outweighs the bad). At 7:30 last night Jameson's breathing tube was taken out and the strong little guy comfortably breathed on his own for about 10 hours before he went home to receive his new, perfect body.
We thank each and everyone of you for your unfailing love and prayers for us. We know that God has answered all your prayers for Jameson. We feel a peace that passes all understanding.
Our memorial service is set for this Friday at First Baptist of Orlando's Henry Chapel at 11 a.m.
Thank you.
Todd and Melisa
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Mar 1, 2009
Where do I begin.....the last 2 days have been an emotional roller coaster for Todd and me. Jameson is still on the ventilator. His swelling has gone down and now it is a balancing game of trying to keep all of his fluids normal. The doctors and nurses are really getting a full days work with our baby. He is just a little high maintenance =). Needless to say, we have really connected with all of our nurses and they have become our friends. The doctors are concerned about brain trauma and at 4 or 5 on Monday morning he will have a MRI of his brain. This will answer a lot of our questions. Someone prayed today that none of this has surprised God and that He has gone before us and has prepared us for the results. We know that fear does not come from Him....so please pray that we will not be fearful of the results of the MRI. God WILL only give us His best and there is a comfort in knowing this is God's will for our lives.
I was once asked a very hard question....and the question was this. If God did not do one more thing for me or if He did not answer one more prayer...Has God done enough? I was torn. But ultimately my answer was yes. God does NOT need to answer one more prayer or do one more thing for me....He has done it ALL when He gave me His only Son.....Jesus Christ!!! That was enough.
Thanks for your prayers.
Love,
Melisa
I was once asked a very hard question....and the question was this. If God did not do one more thing for me or if He did not answer one more prayer...Has God done enough? I was torn. But ultimately my answer was yes. God does NOT need to answer one more prayer or do one more thing for me....He has done it ALL when He gave me His only Son.....Jesus Christ!!! That was enough.
Thanks for your prayers.
Love,
Melisa
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Feb 26, 2009
Today was much like yesterday...not much change. It is a time for Todd and I to be still and know that God is God and His timing is perfect. Jameson is no farther along than yesterday. A very insightful doctor told me today, "Melisa, he is NOT getting worse". So instead of thinking that he is not getting better...my new way of thinking is this...we are not getting worse. We are just waiting for Jameson to let us know what we can do next to help him. I found myself thinking today that this really stinks and it is not fair and so on and so forth. I was quickly reminded that when I am thankful it is hard to be negative. So, I decided to think about what was positive and I came up with far more reasons to be joyful than to be unhappy and negative. Yes, this is hard and there are times when it has been unbearable, but we have not lost hope. We serve a BIG God with BIG plans for our baby boy. I WILL accept this trial and praise God that He has given Todd and our family EVERYTHING we need to go through it.
Thanks for ALL of your prayers.
Love,
Melisa
Thanks for ALL of your prayers.
Love,
Melisa
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
